Unprepared for the obituaries

We desire to meet beautiful, intelligent, charming women

Women who earn their own incomes and pay their own bills

Women who will sometimes be willing to go dutch or even take us out at their expense

They may refuse to wash our clothes or scrub floors, but we hope they can and are willing to cook

We desire to meet women who won't solely judge us on the depth of our wallets, height or penis sizes

But judge us mainly according to our character

Women who listen more to their hearts and less to their friends

Women who won't pressure us into a commitment and marriage before we are ready

Women who will maintain their beauty and sexiness even after the honeymoon

Women who will respect and get along with our mothers

Women who will birth healthy babies who will later do well in school, get good jobs, move out of our homes and start their own families

Before then, we pray our faces don't appear in the obituaries

We desire to meet tall, rich, handsome men

Men who will make us go weak in the knees and dramatically increase our heartbeats

Men who will dine us in the finest restaurants, buy us luxurious gifts and fly us to exotic holiday destinations

Men who will hold doors and pull seats for us, men who will call us daily to say, "  How was your day baby?"   ''I'm sorry baby,'' ''I love you baby,'' ''Good night baby''

Men who drive luxurious cars and live in posh neighbourhoods

Men who will focus our eyes on ours' and not on our cleavages (at least on the first date)

Men who will assist us cook and wash dishes

Men who are unafraid of commitment, propose marriage and don't stray

Men who consistently give us multiple orgasms

Men who will be excellent providers to our children

Children who will later do well in school, get good jobs, move out of our homes and start their own families

Men who will spend more time with us than with the boys watching football or at work

Men whose mothers won't interfere in our marriages

Before then, we pray our faces don't appear in the obituaries

We believe we can make our societies better by making a difference

So we vie for parliamentary seats or the presidency

We print T-shirts, we upload websites, we send SMS,' we spend much time on the road strategising, building alliances, addressing rallies, raising campaign funds

We woo voters by promising them smooth roads, affordable education and healthcare, jobs, security, less regulations and taxes for businesses...

Once in office we aim to fulfill our promises

And pray that neither corruption nor sex scandals derail our plans

After the expiry of our terms we aspire to leave unmatched legacies

Before then, we pray our faces don't appear in the obituaries

One day we plan to stop taking orders from our bosses and be our own bosses

We aim to determine our market value, when to go to work, when to leave, when to take leave...

Despite lack of start-up capital and an abundance of discouragement from colleagues, friends, spouses and relatives

We pray our businesses will crawl, walk, run and fly

Create employment for others, contribute to our countries' economies and tax collections

Peerhaps  later take our companies public or leave them to our offspring and pray they survive beyond three generations

Before then, we pray our faces don't appear in the obituaries

copyright 2007: festus mbuimwe aka wamoronjia